George Un-gelled

In honor of the first term being over, I decided to bring you a list of wonderful quotes from school. There are so many of them that I'm going to start with my english class, taught by George Gordon-Smith, aka George.

"It's amazing how a boring last name like Smith can be spruced up by adding another boring name."

"I've been married five months, and I have three kids. Yeah, we're on some serious fertility drugs."

"I heard a couple people talking about their next class 'Human Geography." Is that just a euphamistic way of saying Anatomy?"

"I don't ever see numbers, I'm an english professor, so I just have to write them sometimes."

"Joe without an "e" is very feminine." - Joe
"Well...I put a dot there to suggest that something else might be there." - George

"My head is not art of my body cuz I can't see it." - George's son

"If you're venting in your opinion editorial, you need to stop, and go get a slurpie."

"Geroge Bush knows how to deal with terrorists, and if you dont' vote for him, then you'll get blown up." - Jake

"Not that you're all on a band wagon. A big, red bandwagon."

"I need my softwood chopsticsk, so I need to make sure we destroy the rainforest."

"Brittany Spears doesn't even know it's election year."

"If you're worried about drawing attention to yourself, I think you made the right decision in standing up. And taking your backpack with you." - George to a girl who was blowing her nose

"What works for Leah may not work for Joe, who, obviously, gets dsitracted by every girl reading the Book of Mormon."

"One of the great things about spects is...I don't know!"

"every m&m that you eat has a drop of child blood in it. That's why I don't eat red m&m's."

"You guys are smarter than you look!" - George
"So are you!" - Kayla

"No. I make a concious effor to ignore everything you say Joe...If it makes you feel better to think that the things you say make an impact on my subconcious, then yes, Joe, I did."

"Style: It's what you wear!! Has nothing to do with chocolate."

"Yes. Run. I need to run away from this class."

"Well, that's my goal. To make you smile. I don't care about teaching!"

I knew you'd laugh. As I lay here, crippled, saying 'Rhetoric! Rhetoric!' As you walk away."

"The terrorists are coming!" - Joe
"I don't know how to respond to that..." - George

"I'm an english teacher. This kind of beauty just vomits from my mouth."

"I didn't catch that last part...cuz my brain just had a meltdown."

"You don't want to see George ungelled."

"Because she's a mother of five and has killed a moose, that really appeals to middle class mothers."

"Why can't you vote?"
"Because I'm not a citizen, I'm a permanent resident." - George
"WHY??!?!?!" - Me
(I felt bad about that one later....when the whole class was laughing at me)

"This is great! ...Disturbing, actually."

"This is going to go in the magic box of happiness." "The what...has no magic box."

"Let me just tell you how great I am."

"The marker gods are against me."

"You can either argue why Obama won...or why McCain lost."

"We'll not go into epithets here, cuz...I might get fired." - Talking about the type of Mavericks McCain and Palin are

"I don't want you to think that I'm 100% democrat and vote democrat all the time, cuz I don't vote at all!!!"

"So you really ARE republican!" - Matt
"Psh! Don't insult me!" - George